Why Your Instagram Isn't Ready for a Dog (and Neither is Your Apartment)

 Let's face it, puppies are adorable. Balls of fluff with eyes that melt glaciers and a penchant for chewing things that aren't their chew toys (like your favorite shoes or, you know, the drywall). They're practically social media gold, guaranteed to garner a flurry of likes and comments from your dog-obsessed friends. But hold on a second, there, Snaps McGee, before you succumb to the cuteness and bring home that eight-week-old hurricane. Owning a dog is a big decision, and for some folks, it's a recipe for disaster. Here's a handy guide to see if your life (and furniture) are truly #DoggoReady.

Sign #1: Your Social Calendar Rivals Kim Kardashian's

Do weekend getaways and after-work drinks define your existence? A dog is basically a furry toddler that needs constant attention (and unlike a toddler, won't develop the ability to make its own charcuterie board). Leaving your pup home alone for eight hours a day while you conquer the world (or at least your inbox) is a recipe for separation anxiety, chewed furniture, and potentially disgruntled neighbors.

Sign #2: Your Idea of Exercise is Scrolling Through Instagram

Sure, chasing squirrels in the park sounds delightful in theory, but the reality is, dogs require daily walks (rain or shine, hangover or not). Owning a dog is basically signing up for a personal trainer you can't fire (and who may poop on the carpet if you neglect your duties).

Sign #3: Your Apartment Looks Like a Minimalist Magazine (Emphasis on the Minimal)

Imagine a tiny tornado with a wagging tail. That's a dog in a small, clutter-free apartment. Dog toys, chewed shoes, and muddy paw prints will become your new décor. If the thought of sacrificing your pristine aesthetic makes you twitch, then maybe a goldfish is a better fit for your lifestyle.

Of course, if you lead an active life, have a loving home environment, and can handle the responsibility, then a dog can be a wonderful companion. But for those who prioritize jet-setting, spotless apartments, and uninterrupted Netflix binges, remember, sometimes the most responsible #Love is knowing when to say 'no' (to that adorable puppy in the window).

Who knows, maybe a Tamagotchi is more your speed. At least they can't eat your shoes (and the worst they can do digitally is die. Which, hey, free start over!).